The "Pin the Name on the Boobs" Game!

Here are the rules...

Below you have eight pictures of torso's in various states of undress.

You have to, from our "Cool Dudes and Dude-ettes" group on Facebook, list which member of the group matches each chest.

Please only use first names as this blog is public (tho there are no face pics or full names shown anywhere so it is completely anonymous).

Put your answer in the form of a comment below at the bottom of the blog in the format of 1-Name, 2-Name, etc...

Once I get all the comment answers that I think that I am going to get I will post in our FB group the correct order and who came the closest to getting them all correct. Obviously my man and I will not play, as we've seen all these pictures as they were sent to us.

If you decide that you want to participate, feel free to send me a picture of your chest/torso area and I will add it to this blog after the fact and post an announcement for everyone to come back and guess on the 9th, or 10th pictures added. Again, this is for males and females...

Start guessing!

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

My Costume Says Rape Me? Or Slutting Around on Halloween...

As much, or little, clothing as a woman chooses to wear in public, nothing gives someone the right to touch her. As nice as the woman to the right looks (even I would love to touch her, those boobs are so perky and bouncy looking, and the curve of that hip is delicious, Lol), and as unappealing as the women to the left look, All of these women have the same rights to their body as the others...

 I've found and read a lot of blogs lately (SerenaDante, MonsterFresh, TrulyEqual, AngryHarry, Ezinearticles even YahooAnswers to link a few) about how the various views on womens clothes as related to whether they should be raped or not. I feel the need to chime in on this topic. Mostly because it; a. hits close to home; b. ties into the religion topic that caused such a debate a couple days ago here on my blog; c. is another topic that will demonstrate how absolutely retarded majority of people are (which is always amusing to write about, Lol) and; c. is a sexual topic which is what this blog is about anyways...

Now, to most of you the subject will seem like common sense. If I say things like "women who dress in clothes that show too much leg and cleavage wants to be raped" or "it's not rape when a woman is asking for it by wearing THAT in public" or "you can't rape a slut/whore" majority of you will write me off as a total quack. But there are some people out there who will simply agree with those statements. They have been brainwashed by either society or religion... or they are plain twisted in their own minds.

I do think that women who dress like whores like to be viewed as such - I know when I dress like a slut with my tits hanging out of my shirt, I definitely appreciate all looks that men give me - BUT even whores have the right to say no. In states where prostitution is legal, a whore can still choose her clients and can still bring a john up on rape charges because he didn't respect "no" from her. So, even when a woman wants to be viewed as a sex object for the day, it doesn't mean she is giving up all rights to do or NOT to do what she wants with her body. A girl may go out in public wearing an outfit that seems to talk to a man. But it is saying "look at me, I'm sexy" - nothing she wears is ever saying "rape me" and no man has the right to confuse that basic point.

People can say that "rape isn't about sex its about power" all they want, but in the end it it still about sex. If it were JUST about power, the rapist would leave his clothes on and beat the hell out of his victim - rapists rape. That's what makes them rapists. Therefore rape is about sex. Men who rape (and, yes, there are women who rape, but they are few and for ease of reading I am going to use male pronouns) are turned on sexually, perhaps by the power trip, but regardless, they are turned on sexually by a woman and do not have the common sense and self control to pursue her sex in a normal, healthy fashion and instead force themselves on her and into her. There is no excuse, no justification, no reason that can make this lack of simply human decency OK or right in any way. LEAST of all her clothing. A woman is allowed to go outside wearing anything or nothing that she wants and not run any higher risk of being raped then were she to be completely covered.

A lot of the blogs that I've found recently, due to it being this time of year, center around what is being coined as "Slutoween" and how the increasingly revealing Halloween costumes are "to blame" for men raping the women who wear them. Now I personally have a fairly slutty Halloween costume this year. I can tell you with no hesitation that if a man had tried to rape me either of the past two nights, besides the fact that he'd be dead, killed by my boyfriend in his executioner costume, I would NOT have blamed the fishnets I was wearing for him trying to rape me ... I would have blamed him.

I was raised to believe that all men have no self control and it was completely up to the woman to keep "impure thoughts" from entering any man around her's head. Men were NOT to be blamed for anything that they did sexually that a woman "asked for" by being too sexual of a being. Women who are even slightly sexual are on their own and not to be either trusted nor respected by men.Youth group even had a dress code of no knees showing and at least four inchs for straps on sleeveless shirts (ie no tube tops, spagetti straps or even normal sleeveless tank tops). Women are still making up for force-feeding Adam the cursed apple way back in the garden of Eden and hence we are responsible for ALL of their downfalls to this very day. It is our responsibility as paroled-women-kind that no man is tempted down the evil path again.

This very illogic was one of the reasons that I did not talk about being raped for years after it happened in college. It was because of this misguided brainwashing. I honestly felt that it was my fault somehow that a man on his second date with me was expected to / allowed to force himself on me. I believed that maybe because I wore too little clothing, too much makeup or flirted too much, that he was justified in beating me bruised and raping an eighteen year old girl who he knew to be a virgin.

I know better now. I know that men are people too. Men are not crazed animals with no control over their actions. Men are normal human beings who have no more right to force non-consensual sex then a women has a right to chop off her adulterous husband's dick even if she "feels like it" and "he asked for it" by cheating on her. All people are solely responsible for their actions. All people must live by all laws of the local they live in which are usually based on some form of "as it harm none, do as ye will." This applies to ALL people. men too, not just women.  A woman's clothes no more give a man the right to rape her then a man's slutting gives a woman the right to castrate him.

In this case, (or at least my interpretation of this picture) it looks like the women were having an affair and the husband of the dark haired girl is about to get very very lucky and get every man's threesome wish come true, but in general an affair will just lead to bloodshed, Lol.

Now, of course, anyone who's read my blog knows that I like sexual play that is closer to rape then most women like... I like whips and bruises. I like to be tied up or forced down and to feel like a man is taking control of me. However, I like this play (along with all other women I know that like this play) with my safeword in place and being respected. I like my "rape" fantasies played out under MY rules and MY terms. I love to have a man take me... in the comfort and safety of my bedroom with a man I trust and love, not in the backseat of his SUV because he can't take no for an answer. I love to be bruised the next day from his hands... because I've asked him to spank my naughty ass not because I wouldn't stop struggling and it was the only way he could get me to settle down long enough to get off in me.
 

I have found that women who were raped usually fall in to two categories sexually... they either want nothing to do with any sexual play that reminds them of the incident - which really makes the most sense to me. Or they turn out like me - super kinky chicks who like it rougher then most women ever like it. However, the very nature of most consensual rough play is the opposite of the man raping the woman, in fact, the woman is the one in complete control at all times and SHE says yes/no, stop/go. I think that it's because they need to relive the incident in a way that puts them in control of the situation - and/or the rape incident that she lived through did result in an orgasm on her part and hence something was rewired in her brain to link the rape situation with orgasm and she is trying to recreate that rush in a safe environment.

So, to sum it up here. Women can dress however the heck they want and men do not have the right nor even the excuse to rape them - or sexually assault them - or touch them - or anything beside fantasize about them in their dirty minds. EVEN if it is Halloween. It may make my day when I catch a guy looking at me in the way I know he's fantasizing. It's very flattering to be appreciated as a woman and as a sex object. But, there is a major difference between an appreciating look and rape, and if a person thinks otherwise, they are lacking something that is vital to their very humanity.

Halloween is an awesome time of year! When else can you see a costume like this out on the streets? So much fun to look at, just don't touch unless she verbally asks!

Swinging Horrors, Take One.

My man is an awesome chef. He does most of the cooking  around our house. His specialty is Mexican food - burritos, fajitas, tacos, enchiladas, etc... So I said this to him... "Hun, you know that even tho I love your Mexican food, and I absolutely LOVE when you cook fajitas for me, we both still enjoy going to El Gran Rodeo occasionally right? So what do you think about taking the same approach to our sex life?"

And... now my man and I have been doing the swinging thing for a few months! 

It's been, well, an experience to say the least. This is my second foray into the world of swinging and his first - although we've both had numerous casual and exotic relationships before. He's had many many threesomes as have I, and I've had many foursomes and moresomes. He's dated strippers and whores and been a pimp and a gigolo. I've had masters and slaves, I've had a sugar daddy and been the nympho in many relationships.

I could tell you stories upon stories of the first time a man and I tried swinging, and most of them would make you cringe rather then cum. So many people in this type of life are only in it for themselves. They are only in it because they aren't happy with their partner. Their attitude is more along the lines of "my lover sucks, in the bad way, so why don't I foist him off on some random girl while I get to fuck someone new and hopefully better then my own guy in bed, and if he is at all worth it I will then try to steal the new better lover away from his current relationship"(and of course that happens with both genders, not just women).

All that said, this is the first time and first relationship that either my man or I have been in that we cared SO much about our partner and yet still wanted to try opening up the bedroom to others. I actually kind of find it ironic that one of the only men that I've dated who is completely happy with just me and just monogamy is one of the few that I'm trying to convert into a swinger... Other men and other relationships have been rocky from the start and I wouldn't even think of broaching the concept with them - because they would take the conversation me giving them carte blanc to go fuck anything that moves behind my back (which many of them did anyways).

I think that perhaps it is BECAUSE my man and I are SO stable and secure in our monogamy that we feel free to explore some different spices to add to our relationship. It is because I trust him completely with my heart, soul and body, that I trust that I can give him other women to play with and know that it won't end up in cheating and it wont be difficult  for us to do safely and honestly and that it wont mess up what we have. As I told him. If I had to choose between monogamy forever or messing up what we have, it wouldn't even be a choice in my mind, all other men would become faint blurs on the edge of my vision. And, because I know he feels the same way, we can add a little dash of this and that to our sex life and not risk what we are to each other.

I enjoy watching him have pleasure. Whether it's from me or another woman doesn't matter. I love him and hence his enjoyment alone brings me pleasure, and he is the same way. He knows I am going home with him at the end of the night, so why not be able to watch a live porn acted out in front of his eyes with the woman he loves as the star ... he's always had voyeuristic tendencies anyways! Lol.


Which is a good thing since the only way we will swing with anyone is after we get to know and like them as people. We totally understand if people only want a bedroom based relationship (and we don't think it's wrong in the slightest - just doesn't work for us). We are up front and honest with people from the get-go and tell them that we don't put out on the first date, and maybe not even the 2nd or 3rd. We give people the chance to back out because of this friendship first arrangement. If we meet them in person, then it's with the understanding that we all will spend numerous nights getting to know each other before anything more then a goodnight kiss occurs. We feel that the only way any of this will work is if everyone is honest and on the same page. So, we are very sure to lay it all out before meeting anyone.

Now given this approach of ours, we assume that we will avoid situations like what ended up happening many times to me the last time I was in this life. BUT it has happened to us. We have met many decent people who we've become friends with over the past few months. We have met a few absolutely awesome couples that we are enjoying getting to know and creating a friendship with in addition to all the benefits that we're enjoying as well. Two couples in particular we've become really good friends with and enjoy them in and out of the bedroom. 

One couple in particular I would like to gripe about for a minute and to use as an example of things NOT to do when getting into swinging. These people... we shall call them John and Mary... got the usual lecture from us before even a few minutes of chatting had gone by online (weeks ago). They knew we wouldn't meet til we got a feel for them, and we wouldn't hook up for at least a few face-to-face meetings had occurred.


Even after hearing all this, they continued to chat with us and flirt with us and talked about how awesome it was to meet people who actually wanted to be friends with them and not just get into their pants. It seemed like a promising start to a fun friendship. The only thing that made my man pause was how John would chat him up first thing in the morning and want to know intimate details about me and my pussy.

Anyways, the other night we decided to meet up with them for dinner. We figured it would be a safe time to meet since they "were in town anyways" for a football game that started at 7pm. So, we had a sure excuse to leave after an hour in case we didn't like them. Well, we didn't like them. John in particular was a total redneck creep. His pictures may have technically been him, but they did not show the dirtiness, rudeness, or the sausage like fingers that tried to grope me under the table. He had all the sex appeal of a "funny uncle" who will someday get caught on that "how to catch a predator" show. I cannot describe the deep instinctual shudders that ran through me after less then five minutes in his presence. But, since this scene is about only casual sex, and I claim not to be a shallow person, I didn't run screaming from the restaurant and attempted to give him a chance to have a winning personality or at least some kind of redeeming quality that would make me forget about the creep-factor.

It just went from bad to worse, but since we are decent people, we were friendly and fun and maybe a little more flirty then we should have been. We stood in the parking lot and chatted as I constantly edged further and further away from him as he tried to hone in on my personal space. They claimed their football game didn't actually start until 7:30pm now and that they didn't mind being late to it. We finally managed to make our excuses and got away from them. As we were waxing miserable about them in the car home, they called us and wanted to know if they could come over because they really enjoyed us and wanted to spend more time with us and even wanted to skip their football game (which was their whole reason for being in town in the first place) in order to be with us that night. We claimed tiredness and promised to get back to them by the end of the weekend.


Well, we sent them a very polite email within 24 hours which read: 

"Hey there! Thanks for meeting us last night. We appreciated the conversations and friendliness! For the sake of honesty, we wanted to let you know that we don't think that it will work for us in the swinging sense - the chemistry wasn't there, at least on our side. If you guys are OK with friendship, we would be cool with hanging out again sometime. Again, we enjoyed the company. Hope you have a good rest of the weekend!"

Then we got the following response: 

"your obviusly the new guys at this. there wasnt any chemistry there 4 us toward u.but we was going try to give it a shot.Good luck finding what your looking for . to be honest it will be hard for you to find any people that will play ur dum game of lets hang out till we feel like we want to have sex. most people dont have time to play the gettin 2 b friends game . we were willin to try it 4 you but no more.we dont want u guys anyways i do wish you well in finding what your looking for"

Well, at least he wished us luck, Lol. Come to find out, John has a horrible reputation in the local scene of being a total creep. I started talking to some of the other women I've gotten to know this time around in the lifestyle and they backed me up about him- which made me feel at least a little better. Apparently he has an uncircumcised  micro-penis with head cheese and only manages to keep Mary around because he swings with her (and allows her to swing without him). He did the same thing to keep his ex-wife and they eventually had to drive up to 6-8 hours away to meet couples who would actually meet them and they have never had a second actual sex swinging night with anyone because he is THAT bad. SO I've compiled a list of things we've learned from them:

• Don't constantly ask another man about his wife/gf's pussy if you claim to want to try and be friends.
• Don't come up with bogus reasons to be in the area near the people you want to swing with, otherwise they will find out that you've lied and then you've blown your first impression.
• Don't come to a first date dressed in too tight jeans and a black t-shirt with satanic symbols all over it. 
• Dont talk about planning to beat up your kids and their friends on a first date. 
• Don't eat 4 plates of chinese buffet and spill it all over yourself on a first date. 
• Don't stare at the cleavage of the female half of the couple you're meeting for the first time constantly to the point of NEVER meeting her eyes in a 90 minute time span. 
• Don't put your hands on the female unless her man invites you to.
• Don't act like you can't get enough of the couple and cant wait to have them if you plan to have sour grapes about the fact that they aren't into you. 
• Don't say you're ok with a friendship when you obviously are only into notching your bedpost. 
• Don't try to get in someone's pants when you have nothing to offer in yours (cleanliness and SKILLS count as something - at least have those).
• Don't send emails to couples that can be made fun of on SO many levels.   

 Don't come out of the Deliverance movie, period...

 

Sex Blogs I Read & Love

Listed below are the other adult blogs that I read regularly. Of the literally thousands out there to read these few have managed to catch and keep my attention over time. Some contain articles on life and sex, others are advice columns, some are written by many authors, and some are just plain comic relief. Let me know what you think of them! Hope you enjoy them as much as I do! (They are in no particular order.)
__________________________________________________________________

Always Aroused Girl's Blog - Sex Toy Reviews, Sex and Politics, and Comic Relief "Between writing a personal blog, looking at porn, building websites and reading lots of books, this Always Aroused Girl enjoys petting her cats. No that is not a euphemism. Well, maybe it is."

Trinity-Pup - A Collared Submissive Girl's Diary of Kinky Nights "I am a collared submissive and owned by a wonderful Master. He told me He would show me who was in charge, who owned me and would make sure I felt deeply submissive by the time He had finished with me."

Hot Alpha Female - Sassy Girl Gives Dating and Sex Advice "Brutally Honest Dating Advice … I'm just a girl, who has had some dating experience, read a whole lot of books and has extraordinary passion about the dating game, who will give advice to anyone and everyone who is willing to listen."

Honey and Lance - Two Friends Give Sex Advice and Share Stories "Perspectives on dating, relationships, pickup, sex, and life. We blog about dating, relationships, seduction, sex, and everything in between. Lance is a single social artist based in Orlando, Florida. Honey is in a long term relationship with Jake and they live together in Phoenix, Arizona."

Carnivalesq - Porn / Sex Toy Reviews and Sex Stories "Join me for some creative writing, frank explorations of sex and sexuality, some sex toy reviews and often, far too much information."

Carnal Nation - Sex in the News and Stories to Make You Blush "CarnalNation provides comprehensive coverage for grown-ups. We publish original, incisive and uncensored content. We make this commitment at all levels: the personal, the political, and the perverted. We know you take your fun as seriously as we do, so we invite you to realize and explore your interests, desires, and curiosities."

Hey Epiphora - Sex Toy Reviews "Sex toy reviews and musings, no sugarcoating. I'm fascinated by gender, in lust with writing, driven by coffee. I type quickly, eat slowly, and watch porn for hours. I greatly prefer cats to children, and always want to be drinking something while I write. I’m pansexual and a feminist — two of the only labels that really suit me. I am also painfully monogamous and very vanilla."

Pink Sex Geek - Girl Share Sex and Life Stories and Sex Toy Reviews "I’m Crista, and I am a Pleasure Based/Sex-Positive Sex Educator and Toy Goddess. That can be a bit of a mouthful, so I stick with Sex Geek. Pleasure Based meaning I teach sex education to adults with an emphasis on how to have a more enjoyable and orgasmic sex life either with partners or with yourself."

The Cherry Scoop - Sex Toy Reviews "My name is Sundae and I'm the mysterious figure behind this blog! I've been reviewing sex toys since around August of 2009, so I've had a lot of time to get familiar with products, become connected to the community and be exposed to plenty of fascinating sex info."

Between My Sheets - Submissive Slut's Writings on Sex "I’ve ghost-written over ten sex guide ebooks, including ones on squirting and giving your partner a prostate massage. I suspect they’re good sellers because the client keeps ordering more! I have cinnamon-flavored throat-numbing cream for guys who are too big to otherwise deep throat. I enjoy watching porn while I masturbate."

The Beautiful Kind - Multi Author Blog W/ Sex Columns on Advice, Stories and Kink "The Beautiful Kind is a sex positive community where people can get advice, share their experiences, and learn a thing or two from TBK, a bonafide sexgoddess. This site strives to bring shy folks out of their shell, and offer a safe haven for perverts. All genders, sexual orientations, lifestyles, and fetishes are welcome here. Open, honest, and authentic, The Beautiful Kind is sure to entertain, educate, titillate, and inspire. Smut for smart people."

Sex Is - Edens Fantasies - Multi Author Blog W/ Sex Toy Reviews, Advice and Stories "Find sex tips for everyday life, read opinions on the heated sex debates in our society, make smart and informed sex shopping decisions, open your horizons with new sex techniques and join sex positive EdenFantasys community."

Curvaceous Dee - Chubby Woman Discusses Life, Sex and Kink "Curvaceous, vivacious, tenacious, bodacious. That's Curvaceous Dee! I'm also fat, poly, pansexual, civilly unioned, kinky, kiwi, and happy."

Sexuality Happens - Chubby Bi Sex Blogger and Toy Reviewer "I’m Essin’ Em, your friendly neighborhood feminist, queer, Femme, horny, politically active, questioning, pondering sexologist and sex educator. This blog is a discussion about the full spectrum of sexuality, sex toy/porn/book reviews, pieces of my personal life including snippets of sex stories, poignant news relating to sexuality, sex tips, and amusing tidbits and awkward moments."

Hello Saraid - Sex Toy Reviews and Life/Sex Stories "I’m a normal college student that has a passion for talking about sexuality. On this blog you’ll find my thoughts on how sexuality is presented in the media, how I feel about my own sexual identity, and much more. But, I mainly write sex toy reviews, which in addition to being fun for me to write, are helpful to a wide variety of audiences. I try my best to make my reviews approachable for all age groups and for all walks of life."

Mistress Matisse's Journal - Pro-Domme's Stories of Life in the Business "Seattle writer/professional dominatrix's personal musings, rants and life-trivia... I am a very beautiful, experienced dominatrix with a private, fully-equipped dungeon in Seattle, Washington. I do sessions with beginners as well as experienced submissives."

Desk Full of Dildos - Girl Reviews SexToys and Share Weird Sex Things Found Online "Desk Full of Dildos: your source for sex toy news, reviews, company profiles, snark, and weird adult novelties. I have always been a rabid fan of all things adult, obsessing over toy line debuts the way tech geeks salivate over smartphones and imacs."

DIY Sex Blog - Fun Homemade Sex Toys and Sex In the News "Too embarrassed (or too cheap) to buy sex toys? This site shows you how, step-by-step, to build them yourself. Got ingenious inventions? Don't be shy, share them with us. And if you decide you want to buy instead of make, we give recommendations of online toy stores which have impressive selections."

Kinky Stick Figure - Poking Fun at Sex "I am on a collision course with wackiness. I am likely old enough to be your mother, but I'm still the coolest girl you'll ever meet."

She Loves Sex- Sexy Diversions By Women For Women "Do you love Sex? Do you love to learn about it, read about it, and hear the opinions of other women who love it as much as you do? SheLovesSex gives you custom content we write ourselves and the best sex & dating articles that we find on the net. No searching all over to find the juiciest tidbits. No gossip, no fashion tips... just a bevy of information about sex, in all its facets."

Sexie Sadie - Stories of Seduction "This is where I chronicle my experiences in an open relationship with my wonderful Hubby. I write freely here, and about a concept that you may not agree with straight away. But, I urge you to dig around my posts and see what I have to say, because you just might change your mind about someone like me."

Sexy Blogtime! - Sex Toy Reviews, Pics of Porn and Sexy Musings "Sexy Blogtime! is Lucy Vonne's input on everything in the adult world. From toy and porn reviews to bringing you the hottest porn studs around in the business. If it sparks her interest and deals with sex then she wants you to know about it. Sex is wonderful! She was named one of the best sex toy reviewers of 2008 by the pleasurists.com."

Tiny Nibbles - Sex Commentary, Accurate Sex Info and Erotica "Violet Blue is regarded as the foremost expert in the field of sex and technology, a sex-positive pundit in mainstream media and is regularly interviewed, quoted and featured prominently by major media outlets. She is a published feature writer and columnist since 1998, Violet also has many award-winning, best selling books."

Denying Thumper - Male Sub's Diary about Chastity "A blog about a masochistic, submissively-inclined, orgasm-denied male bunny locked in chastity."

Bad Bad Girl - Submissive Girl's Sex Diary On Being Owned "I'm a cool chick who likes to use the word “cunt." I believe in being sex-positive and hate-negative. I think chicks with real tits are sexy. I like to talk dirty and curse incessantly. I love dildo’s and vibrators but will never choose one over the real thing."

Britni's Shameless - Bitchy Bi Girl Sharing Thoughts on Sex and Life "I'm nothing but a brash and impetuous girl striving to be true to myself while searching for somewhere to belong, someone to love, and a better version of me.